First Anniversary

I had been warned that the "firsts" of everything will be really difficult after the death of a child.  Fortunately none of the firsts had been too difficult.  I would

say for me, Mother's Day was the hardest.  But that all changed the week leading up to the first anniversary of Erin's passing.  Friends started emailing and texting to offer their support and that combined with the stress of researching 25 possible ROTC jobs for next summer made me an emotional mess.  I even went to the ER thinking I was possibly having a heart attack.  All week long, I kept thinking of Erin's last week and what we had done as a family that week.  Fortunately we had spent that last week on vacation at the beach.  We had so much fun surfing, exploring castles, hiking, and playing on the natural rock slides.  It was a wonderful week.  So at least I had some really happy memories. What a tender mercy.

I don't really know what you're supposed to do on the first anniversary.  It is not a time to celebrate so how do you handle that day/week?  Unfortunately, we don't have family closeby but our good friends have made up the difference.  They have spent the entire week serving our family.  We have had more game nights than I can count, pizza dinners, swimming, walking, shopping, trips to the park, the color run, and many other activities. We could not have asked for better friends who have helped ease our pain.  

Today, I attended Sacrament meeting  with another ward because my friend Becky was speaking.  I had dreaded going to church with my branch because I was afraid I would cry if anyone talked to me.  Then I spent the afternoon watching a movie with Eric and playing games with Mario and the kids.  We learned a new game, "Cover Your Assets" that is super fun and has become a family favorite.  

Nate and I made a box of brownies that Erin had bought in Spain.  It expired last October but I didn't have the heart to throw the box away.  They turned out to be delicious.  I remember how Erin would buy all these cookie and brownie kits there and the directions were all in Spanish and we'd have to use google translate to try to figure out the ingredients and directions.  We would have to covert the measurements from grams to ounces which was always a challenge. The oven was always a problem because they work differently in Spain so I couldn't quite figure out the right settings and time.  What fond memories I have with Erin trying to bake in Spain (if you can even call that baking when it is from a kit.) I miss her baking and cooking.  Fortunately, all her brothers  have taken over that duty. Even Eric enjoys baking cookies.  

Tonight, Chris Jones will make us a big Asian dinner.  He is an amazing chef so that will be delicious.

It's been a very difficult week and as Mario said to my dad, "Terri cries at the drop of a hat."  That has been true this week but I think I deserve some time to be sad so that is ok.  I'm hoping tomorrow will begin a new chapter and I can focus again on serving others and being a light to others who are suffering.  But I'm truly thankful for all those that served me this week.

I came home to this long note and a bag full of yummy cookies.  They were from a couple of Erin's friends in another ward. 

.  Here's Nate baking Erin's brownies:

Here's Zach reading a bedtime story to Lindsey's son, Maddux.  I know he is going to make a wonderful father. 

Nate and I made teddy bears for a family that lost their mother last year.  She left behind 3 small children.  He has such a gentle heart.  

 Here's a sampling of texts I have received from friends:

We miss you Erin!  We love you and look forward to the day we are reunited.  We've been promised that this time apart will feel as only a small moment.  I believe that to be true.

Color Run 2016

Erin ran the Omaha Colorfoam Run two summers ago with several friends.  Nate and Zach ran too.  A couple months ago, a friend told me that one of Erin's best friends, Cora, was coming back from

Minnesota to run the race with some friends in Erin's memory.  Becky, Lindsey, Nate, and Zach wanted to run too.  I stayed back with Mario and watched the kids just like we did 2 years ago. I thought it would be hard to go watch but our friends have been wonderful this week and have tried to make it as painless as possible.  We are so blessed to have good friends who love us and Erin.

School is Out

We just started our summer and boy are we happy to be done with school.  The boys had a party Thursday night with 5 friends to celebrate.  We did pizza and a movie.  It was storming outside with possibilities of tornados so I'm glad we were still able to have it and everyone was safe.

Friday morning, we went down to Kansas City and visited the Federal Reserve Bank museum.  The boys are working on their personal management merit badge so it was a perfect place to tour and learn more about interest rates, money, and all that fun stuff.  I sometimes wish I had gotten a finance degree.  I love that stuff. After the museum, we stopped at Jason's Deli for dinner and then we went to the Kansas City Temple to do baptisms.  This was the boys' fourth time going to the temple and each of those times was in a different state (Florida, Hawaii, Nebraska, and Missouri).  We hope to add Nauvoo and some Utah temples to that list in the near future.

For Memorial Day, we went to the Papillion Ward breakfast.  Now we plan to swim at the Theobald pool and then have the Jones Family over for a bbq and some games.  

We look forward to spending time with Melissa and her family at the lake too.

Eric Goes to Washington DC

The Stake President works as a professor and researcher at UNO where Eric attends school.  President Derrick offered Eric an internship job with him when Eric began his freshman year.  It's been a great job because not only is it good experience but he can mostly choose his hours and he doesn't have to leave campus to go to work.  So I don't have to worry about him driving in the snowstorms.  In fact, since he lives on campus, he leaves his car parked at his dorm most of the time and just walks everywhere.  He asked if he could go on a trip to DC when President Derrick had to select two students.  It is an all expense paid work trip where he will have the opportunity to get some training.  On what?  I'm not sure but he was so excited to go and stay in a hotel

all by himself.  I tried to get him to take me, but of course I'm still in Nebraska.  Mario may get to go to DC next month so I may tag along with him. He was much more receptive to the idea of me going along and Eric agreed to babysit.

We secretly put little Pooh in his suitcase as a stowaway.  He sent us a picture which is so cute.  By little Eric is growing up!  He's going on business trips.  He and Caitlin tell me that since I'm a stay-at-home mom that my business trips are family vacations.  They told me I go on a lot of business trips.  I thought that was funny.   More true than I want to admit.  I got them back by telling them my favorite business trips were alone with Mario and no kids.  

 This is the only other picture he's sent so far:

Planting Pumpkins

Sister Flynn asked the boys if they would like to plant some pumpkins and gourds with her.  She has a great apple orchard and recently started planting some Christmas trees.  She thought it would be fun to grow pumpkins this year. She has never grown them so she did lots of research and bought all the necessary supplies. The boys went over yesterday and planted a few of each of the four different kinds of pumpkins and 2 different kinds of gourds.  She's hoping that they can grow enough of them to have a little business and sell them for Halloween.  She is so good with the boys.  She has a lot of patience and love for our family.  I love that she is teaching them to work hard and it's the perfect project for her to do with them since I don't have a green thumb.  

6th Grade Field Day

It occurred to me this past week that I should be getting really sad.  It's my boys' last couple weeks of elementary school. Maybe it means a little less because I thought last year was their last year since they were going to be in middle school in Spain.  But nonetheless, it started hitting me yesterday as Mario and I sat in the stands and watched our boys compete against other sixth graders around the district.  They set up a track and field day at the high school and had the kids each sign up for 4 events.  Of course Zach was all over this.  He loves competition.  Nate didn't want to go.  But I told him that he should wear Erin's lucky basketball shorts and just go out there and do his best.  Erin would be proud of him no matter how he did as long as he did his best.

He signed up for the 50 meter, 100 meter, the long jump, and the cross country race.  Zach signed up for the 50 meter, 400 meter, long jump, and cross country.  He was also chosen to the A team for a relay race at the end.  He had to try out for the team and was the second fastest. 

Nathan finished first in his 100 meter heat and went on to the semifinals.  We were so proud of him.  He ran hard.  

Zachary made it to the finals in the 50 meter race and came in second place overall.   So that was very impressive.  There were some fast kids out there.  His team took third in the relay so he was slightly disappointed.  The girls A team took first and so did the boys B team.   So their school did very well overall.  

It was so fun to watch these boys hang out all day with these friends they have been with the last four years.  It made me sad to move away again.  One highlight from yesterday was watching the last boy come around the corner in the cross country race.  He was from our school.  A whole crowd of kids from Trumble Park ran out on the field to help him finish the race.  It made me tear up.  These kids love and support each other when it really matters.  They made us proud.

Eric is Home

Eric moved back home for the summer and we couldn't be more thrilled.  We love having him home.  He even pops up to do dishes without being asked after dinner.  He enjoys playing with his little brothers too.